Author: Aya Yusif
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Adnan, Unredacted: It Really Doesn’t Hurt If You Unfollow Me
“I’m just praying to reach 80K on Twitter, and everything will be alright!” My friend said this with the desperation of a man waiting for the results of a medical examination. He was sitting on the edge of my desk at the office, scrolling endlessly through his phone, refreshing his notifications every few seconds. (Twitter,…
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Adnan, Unredacted: I Survived the Dentist
Today was inevitable; it had to be done. Something I had postponed twice, lied about once, and considered moving cities to avoid. Something terrifying. The dentist. At 4:10 p.m., I was sitting in the waiting room pretending to read an article about how the world was supposedly heading toward World War III while a dental…
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Adnan Unredacted: I Became the Boring Guy at the Beach
I adore people-watching at the beach. They are completely free – shouting with excitement, jumping into the water, talking with their mouths full, careless and light. I, however, don’t like myself at the beach. I’m grumpy. I run away from the sun like it has a personal issue with me. I apply endless layers of…
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Adnan Unredacted: What If I Don’t Want to Count My Macros?
Today, I am a new person. Meet the new Adnan. Adnan, who wakes up at 7:59 a.m.- one minute before the alarm. Not because he wants to, but because his body has apparently accepted that sleeping past eight is personal failure. Adnan, who doesn’t check his phone first thing in the morning, but instead gets…
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Adnan, Unredacted: Just Wanted to Say Happy Birthday
I love birthdays. Every year around December, I buy one of those giant paper calendars they sell on the street, the ones that take up half the wall and come with holidays already printed in red on them with a special quote behind the back each day. Then I dedicate an entire evening to updating…
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Adnan, Unredacted: Somebody Should’ve Seen Me in the Kitchen
At 2:15 PM, I removed the extra “haha” that I had written on the work group chat. Earlier that morning, at around 10:00 AM, I had found out that Khaled got promoted. Khaled. My coworker who does, more or less, the exact same job I do. Apparently, he “needed the opportunity more.” Which, translated loosely…
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Adnan, Unredacted: Please Ignore the Background Noise
I woke up to the sound of my window glass rattling. Not shaking, not the kind of sound you can flip to the other side and ignore. I opened my eyes and stayed there for a second, looking at the ceiling as if it might have anything new to offer. Then I reached for my…
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Adnan, Unredacted: Somewhere Between Olive Trees and Office Desks
“So who do you prefer, this bad guy or the other awful guy?” I heard my coworker asking as he suddenly appeared behind my chair, the way someone might present a clever riddle. Maybe it was spontaneous. Maybe it was meant to be provocative. I am not sure. But this is how I heard it. …
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Adnan, Unredacted: The View from This Table
A green hat, a black fur coat, long black boots. She sits by the window, stirring her coffee without drinking it. A man in a puffy red jacket sits next to her. A third joins them a moment later, tugging off a gray scarf and carrying a large gift bag. The man in the scarf…
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Adnan, Unredacted: On Sounding Normal in Public
Theory about voice changing.Can a person speak in different voices?Is it normal to talk in two different voices? This was my search history for the day. I only noticed it later, when I got home and sat on my bed, tapping through Instagram, then WhatsApp, then a half-open browser tab I didn’t remember opening, while…